Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Doing Things Backwards: Obligatory First Post

So often you read these blogs that folks start and they have the obligatory first post.  You know, the one where the person describes who they are, what reasons they have for starting their blog and where they say how they're going to keep up the journal.

Well, here's MY take on that obligatory first post... yes, yes, it's my second post and I'll write it how I want :)

Why The Blog?
I started this blog as a way to recount my experience detailed in the actual first post.  (You can find that link, I won't stop ya.)  Then I realized that the reason Lilith poked at me so much to write that first post was because I needed to keep witnessing such events and chronicle my experiences as a High Priestess of Lilith. 

The Singing Q'desha
When I started walking my path as an Amazon Priestess Initiate, I started giving thought to what I wanted my "ministry" to be.  What were my specialities and talents in the realm of the magical and spiritual?  What areas did I want to focus on as my forte in my work when I was finally ordained as an Amazon High Priestess?

I have been singing and banging on musical instruments for as long as I can remember.  When I was a toddler, the upright grand piano in my parents basement was the place I liked to play at being a Carnegie Hall Pianist. I started taking music lessons at a very young age.  Through the years I've played a variety of instruments, sung in a number of choirs, and have even spent a while as a Music Education major in college.  Music has always been a part of my very soul for as long as I can remember.  I love to sing and I love to drum.  Thankfully, I found a coven where both of these skills are regularly put to use.

I use my musical skills often in my work as a Priestess.  I believe that words, tones, and intentions combined into one focused working can be a very powerful thing.  A well crafted song or chant (spoken or intoned) can be used to pump up the magic in many things.  The pouring of emotion and intent into these pieces of music can imbue our workings with so much more strength.  The very act of listening to music can transform things in amazing ways. I use my skills to craft these musical pieces, whether written by me or another, through the use of my voice and/or drum. 

So now you know the musical part.

As for the Q'desha...

A few years after I moved to the SF Bay Area, my life went through a radical shift and I was finally living fully on my own.  I was just out of a bad marriage, I was supporting myself, and the internet was rapidly becoming an integral part of everyone's everyday lives.  Craigslist and their free personal ads section is an amazing playground for a reckless and brave woman trying to explore every crevice of her sexuality while living in a city with a Heavy Sex Culture badge sewn to its chest.  It's also a handy tool for having fun when traveling to other cities and countries! 

I kept a blog, online, where I shared many of my experiences in great detail.  Sex with men and women, sex with individuals and with groups, sex with people from a "fetishized subculture" and sex with more vanilla partners, sex in comfortable places and in dirty dungeons with men lined up for a thrust or two - there were so many things to see, do, and experience when it came to sex! Living my life so out in the open, I began to see how very differently others were now viewing me, a woman who was actively seeking out ways to satisfy her sexual curiosities and desires.  Most people didn't understand the notion that a woman could be so sexually curious and adventurous in as blatant a way as the stereotype of the man constantly trying to get laid.  I had more than my fair share of "friends" who spoke poorly of "me and my promiscuity".  Nearly everyone I knew was uncomfortable with my openness around the subject of sexual activity.  No one seemed to understand why I did what I did. 

During my initiatory year, I learned of ancient temple priestesses and priests who provided the masses with a gateway to the divine.  The word Q'desha has its roots in the Hebrew word for "sanctified, dedicated and holy."  In short, the Q'desha were the sacred prostitutes of a temple and allowed for the mortal body to connect with The Goddess thru sexual contact and worship.  However, these Q'desha were often slandered and disapproved of by "polite society".  Given my body of knowledge in the sexual arts, my possession of a fearless voice, and my experiences being so similar to what I was learning about the Q'desha, I began to see where the path of my Priestesshood would begin to take me. 

Before folks get to thinking that I'm running about fucking any and every person seeking connection to the divine, as fun as that sounds, my Priestess work does not involve the act of sex with others.  (Ironically enough, I have found myself completely in love and in a monogamous relationship with a phenomenally wonderful man who makes me tremendously happy.)  In the process of exploring many different sex-based interest communities and amassing a wealth of my own personal sexcapades, I also studied the way that sex, psychology, and magic wove themselves together.  There's a lot more to working with sexual energies and magic than the act of sex itself and this is something I hope to spend more time writing about in this blog.

So... there you have it and here ends the obligatory first post.

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